Dealing with Unhappiness

Someone on my Instagram asked me recently to write about overcoming unhappiness and in serious cases, depression. This is a tricky concept and one has to tread lightly. There are times in ones life where sadness will overcome the happiness that is the bubble which encased you for your younger, more naive days. Being a teenager isn't even really an emotional roller coaster, most of it is a downward track, with a few small ups in between. Really it's a hard time because your emotions are literally all over the place. One day I'll be motivated, ready to be healthy and run every day until I'm toned as can be, then the next day I'm sat at home sobbing as I listen to Sam Smith.
I think depression really does burrow right down into how you feel. It does not show at the surface and it hides extremely easily. It isn't that noticeable in a persons attitude at all. Depression, I believe stems in the mind more than anything. It completely takes over your thoughts and stops you from thinking freely. It doesn't like you thinking alone and feeling positive about yourself. I imagine it as a weed, slowly growing inside of you. Yes, you may think, that's the worst thing to say. Imagining it growing doesn't help! But lets remember that without any water or sun the flower will die.
Now though I am nowhere near being a counselor, as I repeatedly say, I do have some factors that may help you deal with depression. The most important thing is don't feed the depression. Don't give into it. You can control the way you think and feel, even though it doesn't feel like it. If you think bad things about yourself day after day, soon you will become acquainted with that bad thought and accustom it to yourself. Instead of seeing the bad things, try and just focus your mind on good things; for example today instead of thinking "What if i get anxious in school and I'm all alone?!" I thought "How nice does that sunset look? Ooh I can listen to Sam Smith as I walk!". It sounds dull but if you just focus on those tiny parts in your life that offer you some joy it will help your brain start to notice the better things in life and forget the negativity.
I would also make sure to not surround oneself with negative people. There's no point being with someone who constantly puts you down or makes you feel small compared to them, You deserve someone who actually sees beneath your outside attempt at smiles. Also, if your friend says you 'shouldn't be sad' or you 'have nothing to be sad about' then get them out o your life now. It angers me so much to hear of people doubting their emotions because their friend thinks they can evaluate their friends life better than the actual person. If you feel unhappy to the point where you question whether it's a healthy state of sadness, you don't need too back yourself up. Your friends should believe you and offer support.
Don't compare yourself to others. I used to look at other people and be like 'no I get why they're sad' and be like 'but I have no reason, all that's happened is my parents divorcing, I should be happy it's nothing more serious', and it's stupid because depression can target you over anything. Whether you have something disrupting your life or not you are still aloud to suffer from depression. It's not subjected to certain people. If you feel depressed, then that is okay. Instead of fretting over your non existent/none serious problems, focus on beating it.
Don't listen to people. I am constantly told I am a 'drama queen'-even by my doctor over anxiety! Isn't that supportive?-because I don't deal with things well. I don't- I don't like getting on buses, going into open spaces, meeting my friends parents, going to concerts, because that's just my personality. It's not your fault if you are emotional and you feel like you need help. Its not anything to be ashamed of, it's a natural human emotion, just to a more serious extent. Having depression does mean that you will be sensitive and deal with things differently. That's normal-you do have a problem; not a bad problem, it is fixable. You don't see a person with a broken leg walking do you? That makes the situation worse. It's the same with depression.
Try to do more activities which you enjoy-for me it's reading John Green, etc, watching The Great Gatsby over and over, and listening to music, with youtube and food added into the mixture as well. If I have a bad day, I think to myself I have some youtube videos to watch or a book to read. It really does help sometimes to know that there's something you can enjoy at home.
I would also try and confide in someone, I waited three years too and it was a mistake. It's so much nicer being able to message someone if you feel crap. Your friends are there to help you, You don't have to tell everyone, just tell one person or two like I did. In honesty, I can't say TELL A PARENT! because my parents don't know a hell of a lot about what I feel or what I've done(nothing weird by the way, I live a boring life don't worry), you tell them when you are fully ready to. Don't force yourself into it! Take your time.
I could also say, eat healthy and exercise! It makes you feel so much better! like a cheesy commercial. I just go for unhealthy option. I eat so much bad food it's unreal. Not that you should follow that same path, but come on-we all love a Nandos or Mcdonalds. There's no denying it.
I will write more on this topic, as this isn't all there is too say, but my hands are aching and I've been writing this for an hour. Did this help you? Did this offer you any emotional support? If you have a query then just comment it. Or just a comment comment, it's up to you.
I hope you have an amazing rest of your day!
Stay strong and safe my dear readers and fellow bloggers, and let me leave you with some links that will help you!
http://www.relatesandh.org.uk -confidential counselling for teenagers
http://www.cruse.org.uk -support service for 12-18 year olds suffering family bereavement
http://www.youngminds.org,uk -support for young persons mental health+well being
http;//selfharm.co.uk/home -self harm help

Until next time,
B.B x